Behold, thy King homereth

Barry Bonds has crowned himself the new Home Run King. In his first proclamation from the throne, he assured us that "This record is not tainted at all; at all."

Riiiiiiiight…

Let's play a little game of before-and-after to see if King Barry is telling the truth. The pictures on the left are from early in Barry's career, when he played for the Pirates. The ones on the right are present-day Barry. Two main differences come to mind right away. The first is that Barry was wise to ditch the 'stache. Second, I'm forced to wonder what sort of workout regimen a person could undertake in order to DOUBLE the size of their own head!

I get it that baseball had to do something after the strike in 1994 to get the fans back in the seats, but watching juiced players hit juiced baseballs out of shrinking ballparks isn't what the game of baseball is all about. If watching cheaters pat each other on the back and change the rules while the game is being played were entertaining, the United Nations would have an impressive following.

Barry Bonds has become the king of a fallen generation, made up of "athletes" who are willing to cheat and a league who wont (can't?) do anything about it. Bond's record is meaningless, and it is a disgrace to a sport with such a noble history.