So useful it's useless

Wenger, the "real" Swiss Army Knife company, is selling a $1,200 knife that boasts 85 implements and 110 "functions." It weighs 2lbs 11ox, and measures almost 9 inches long.

This must be what they had in mind when cargo shorts were invented. And, of course, it comes with the traditional Swiss Army Knife key ring on the end.

Features:

• 2.5" 60% Serrated locking blade
• Nail file, nail cleaner
• Corkscrew
• Adjustable pliers with wire crimper and cutter
• Removable screwdriver bit adapter
• 2.5" Blade for Official World Scout Knife
• Spring-loaded, locking needle-nose pliers with wire cutter
• Removable screwdriver bit holder
• Phillips head screwdriver bit 0
• Phillips head screwdriver bit 1
• Phillips head screwdriver bit 2
• Flat head screwdriver bit 0.5mm x 3.5mm
• Flat head screwdriver bit 0.6mm x 4.0mm
• Flat head screwdriver bit 1.0mm x 6.5mm
• Magnetized recessed bit holder
• Double-cut wood saw with ruler (inch & cm)
• Bike chain rivet setter, removable 5mm allen wrench
• screwdriver for slotted and philips head screws
• Removable tool for adjusting bike spokes, 10mm hexagonal key for nuts
• Removable 4mm curved allen wrench with philips head screwdriver
• Removable 10mm hexagonal key
• Patented locking philips head screwdriver
• Universal wrench
• 2.4" Springless scissors with serrated, self-sharpening design
• 1.65" Clip point utility blade
• Philips head screwdriver
• 2.5" Clip point blade
• Golf club face cleaner
• 2.4" Round tip blade
• Patented locking screwdriver, cap lifter, can opener
• Golf shoe spike wrench
• Golf divot repair tool
• 4mm allen wrench
• 2.5" blade
• Fine metal file with precision screwdriver
• Double-cut wood saw
• Cupped cigar cutter with double-honed edges
• 12/20-Guage choke tube tool
• Watch case back opening tool
• Snap shackle
• Mineral crystal magnifier with precision screwdriver
• Compass, straight edge, ruler (in./cm)
• Telescopic pointer
• Fish scaler, hook disgorger, line guide
• Shortix laboratory key
• Micro tool holder
• Micro tool adapter
• Micro scraper - straight
• Micro scraper - curved
• Laser pointer with 300 ft. range
• Metal saw, metal file
• Flashlight
• Micro tool holder
• Philips head screwdriver 1.5mm
• Screwdriver 1.2mm
• Screwdriver .8mm
• Fine fork for watch spring bars
• Reamer
• Pin punch 1.2mm
• Pin punch .8mm
• Round needle file
• Removable tool holder with expandable receptacle
• Special self-centering screwdriver for gunsights
• Flat philips head screwdriver
• Chisel-point reamer, fork for watch spring bars, small ruler
• Extension tool
• Spring-loaded, locking flat nose-nose pliers with wire cutter
• Removable screwdriver bit holder
• Tire tread gauge
• Fiber optic tool holder
• Can opener
• Patented locking screwdriver, cap lifter, wire stripper
• Reamer/awl
• Toothpick
• Tweezers
• Key ring

HT: Challies