Mom should be married

W. Bradford Wilcox has a wonderfully politically-incorrect article posted on National Review Online, in which he states that "motherhood typically works best — for our nation’s neighborhoods, children, and even most moms — with a wedding ring." This idea has very little popular support in our culture, in which having a father around (or not) has become just another "lifestyle choice." Even more old-fashioned and out-dated is the idea that mommy and daddy should actually be –gasp– married to each other (it's just a piece of paper, right?), or even –here it comes– married to each other *before* they have a baby.

Who am I to judge? How can I make such sweeping moral judgments like this? What if I hurt someone's feelings? Our society has gone out of its way to take what was once marginal and scandalous and make it normal, or even venerable. Because there are no absolutes anymore, one "family unit" is just as valid as the next, and we have no right to make statements like, "Children are better off in families with one mommy and one daddy."

Let's leave the moral judgments aside for a moment, and just look at some facts. Wilcox cites a report, Why Marriage Matters: Twenty-Six Conclusions from the Social Sciences, that clearly states children are better off when their parents stay married. The research shows that children with married parents commit fewer crimes, have fewer serious emotional problems, and better relationships with their mothers.

Of course, these conclusions seem obvious to anyone who isn't drinking the "I'm OK, you're OK" kool-aid. The reality is that not all "family units" are equally valid. We can play make-believe all we want, but our children are the ones paying for our foolishness.